When thinking of holiday's that without my sweetheart, I didn't consider Mother's Day as one that might be difficult. Yet as I sat on my couch today, I looked up at just the right moment multiple times to see on the digital picture frame a photo that often comes to mind when I think of our first ICU stay. It is a picture of him, holding his mother's hand. The picture taken before his trach surgery, which occurred on Mother's Day 6 years ago, ironically also May the 14th. I'm so grateful that I was able to capture such a tender moment. Grateful also for the picture that I took later that afternoon where I was able to spend the afternoon holding his hand. The feeling of hope in that moment was strong as a surgery which once terrified both of us brought freedom. He was also given the gift of being able to breath, which is something that is so easily taken for granted.
While the the past six years have been filled with difficult memories, I strive to remember as well the blessings along the way. Family, friends, nurses and doctors who were there for our journey. Thank-you to everyone for being there at just the right moment with a hug, a text, a listening ear.
At one point when he was in the ICU, my mom was also able to come to the hospital. I don't remember what was said, just the profound feeling of empathy. She had suffered a stroke 6 years prior that changed her life forever. Her time in the hospital and the years rebuilding her life have been difficult, she understands things that others might not.
Here I am now, 6 years later. Also forever changed. Wishing that I could be holding his hand, grateful for the many times when I could.
No comments:
Post a Comment